The Socialization of Jojo

I wish to make this clear from the beginning: it is I, Empress Elisabeth Amalie Eugenie, Empress of the Imperial Empire of Austria Hungaria, who is writing this particular post.

I have been reincarnated as this absolutely stunning, irresistible dog named Sisi, named after me, obviously.

I was torn from my very convivial litter and mater when I was just seven weeks old; and put into the unclever hands of these two Americans who dragged me away to a god-forsaken, tick-infested forest in the middle of nowhere.  I, a daughter of princes and champions; I, a product of breeding and excellence, banished to the hinterlands of Slovakia.

Good god.

I was raised in a neighborhood with many ‘working dogs.’  I totally understand the concept of ‘working dog.’  Of course, my mummy and daddy were not working dogs. They were champions. So were their parents, and grandparents.  But, as I said, I understand the concept, and being around the working classes never bothered me.

But here, ‘working dog’ means ‘watch dog.’  They sit behind their fences in the yards of their masters. They are quiet until you get too close, say: 100 meters. And then they start to bark and charge the fence and generally scare the poo out of one, literally.

It’s just not a great neighborhood to make dog friends.

So I grew up with these two old gits.  The male calls the female Jojo and the female calls the male The Boy.

They are far from my equals, but I like them just the same. They dote on me and Jojo makes me some very nice meals using filet mignon, demi-glace (homemade by The Boy), steaks, chicken and other tasty treats. I show my gratitude by often eating it.

And I finally got used to being in the hinterlands. In fact, it’s been fun romping around in the woods with Jojo, chasing deer and other forest denizens. And it’s so quiet, so peaceful.

And so what happens? For some inexplicable reason I find myself once again wrested from my favorite woods and thrown into a concrete land where nasty large machines hurtle themselves around blind corners, aiming at hapless hounds. Where strange noises shatter the peace both day and night, and fierce, ugly dogs lie in wait to harrass me as I walk outside. Me, an Empress!

Not only that, I’ve got to keep a lookout at the window to warn about any strangers that may be walking down the street by barking loudly and repeatedly when they come into view. (This way I can alert not only Jojo and The Boy, but the rest of the building's residents as well. You can’t be too careful these days.)

There’s one good thing about being in town, though. Jojo is finally learning how to properly interact with the public as a dog-servant.  It is apparently called “socialization”.

In the past, she’d had very little experience with this. Any time another dog, or a person approached she would get all tense and anxious, so of course that would worry me too, and I’d start barking. This made her even more tense, and the cycle continued.

She really is improving, though. For example, I can now lead her to an outdoor café for a glass a wine (she and The Boy) and a bowl of water (me), and she’s much, much calmer. Every once in a while, I’ll have to jump up on her just to see how she’s getting along, but she really does seem to be getting the hang of being in public.

Of course, it doesn’t hurt that the other people, even children (and male dogs – I can’t stand females) all find me so charming and beautiful. That takes a little of the tension away as well.

So, anyway, I’ll make the most of my time as an urbanite. It may be a little less comfortable, a little less pleasant – but at least Jojo will finally be trained.

Comments

[Carol]

LOL! Well done, Sisi!

[Angele Switzler]

Hello Pretty Lady,
Allow me to introduce myself. "I'm that same David Crockett, fresh from the backwoods, half-horse, half-alligator, a little touched with the snapping turtle; I can walk like an ox, run like a fox, swim like an eel, yell like an Indian, fight like a devil, spout like an earthquake, make love like a mad bull, and swallow a Mexican whole without choking if you butter his head and pin his ears back." and it so happens, I also like fancy white women so I couldn't help but notice you.

Sincerely,
Davy, King of the Wild Frontier

[Claire]

They're lucky to have you, Sisi!

[JoEllen Zumberge]

Dankuwel, Claire. (I speak Dutch you know)
They let me ride in the car with them too, every day. We run out to the chata where The Boy putters in his garden while Jojo throws sticks for me. Sometimes, she even walks up the hill with me too.
Then we drive back to a place where lots of cars are people come in and out of a building - I smell food in there - and Jojo and I sit in the back with the door open and watch all the people. I'm getting pretty good at only barking at big bad looking men and female dogs.

[Karen]

Oh JoEllen. How I wish I could meet this Sisi. She sounds so regal compared to me, the lowly blonde cocker spaniel of your youth. You were my favorite person when I walked the earth in Michigan and sometimes accompanied you to other parts of the U.S. Do you remember the time in Minnesota when I valiantly tried to swim to the middle of a lake just to be with you on a pontoon boat. Your father was quite upset that I would be so foolish and he had to turn the pontoon around to come and pick me up lest I drown. I still have fond memories of all we did together during my time with you and I am so elated that you have found another, more high bred canine, to love you. Please give her my regards.
Love, Taffy

[urisk]

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